Apparently, homeowners around Stella Brockman Elementary School believe that somebody in their neighborhood is trapping their cats and then releasing them outside of the city limits because, I’m guessing, they’re a nuisance. 

I’m not a cat person. I spent a year with a roommate that had one, and while I loved having something come up to me when I walked in the door and be genuinely happy that I was there, the times it would randomly crash through the front blinds when I was home alone offset any sort of upside in my mind. 

There’s no worse sound in the world than a cat crashing through metal blinds when you’re trying to sleep – it legitimately sounds like somebody is crashing through your window. 

But with that said, I can’t think of anything that would ever make me feel like somehow sending animals to their death was the right alternative to whatever situation I found myself in. 

Now, it’s important to note that I’ve never had a flower garden – apparently cats like to destroy those – and I’ve never had to deal with cleaning up feline excrement on a regular basis on my property. I could see how that would be frustrating, and how it would garner a response to owners that one may feel aren’t being good neighbors (this is based off of the feedback I received on this story from as far away as Texas). 

But let us be clear about something – dropping off a domesticated animal, if that is what is happening, out in the middle of the country is a death sentence for those animals. I spoke to one gentleman who had his cat make it back to the house after it was presumably dumped, and I was shocked that it managed to survive the farm dogs and the coyotes that are quite plentiful just a few miles outside of the city limits. 

In speaking with my friend Jennifer Hart, I was heartbroken to hear that her father has spent every day since their cat went missing driving around the country looking for any glimpse of their beloved family pet, and I can’t for the life of me think that causing that kind of grief to another human being – a neighbor, no less – in any way is justified. 

If the issue comes down to cats being kept inside versus being allowed outside, there are other ways to make a statement on that – the least of which is calling animal control or, in the event that an animal is trapped, turning it over to the city so that it can find its way back to the owner. 

But essentially killing cats because you’re upset that they’re in your yard? 

That’s just crazy. 

Pigskin prognosticators return

We said we were done last week, and I genuinely thought that would be the case. 

But upon further discussion with the Gentlemen of the Thread, we’ve decided to extend this little charade out another week – partially because it’s fun giving Chris Teicheira the fleeting sensation that he won’t be shaving his head as a result of his poor sports acumen. 

He has asked for a summer reckoning since last season it took almost six months to settle all of the scores that came as a result of our individual braggadocio, and while I think that seeing him without that “good Portuguese hair” would be a good Festivus gift to all of us, I’m inclined to extend his request. 

But we’ll have to see how the rest of the thread weighs in on that. 

Last week Ripon lost to Bear Creek and was eliminated from the CIF Sac-Joaquin Division V playoffs, while Manteca steamrolled American Canyon and will now show down with Christian Brothers – a rematch of a Week 1 dogfight – to determine who gets the chance to likely play Oakdale for a Section championship. 

It’s worth pointing out that the game time temperature the first time these two schools squared off was north of 100 degrees, and that will most definitely not be the case tonight. 

Just to make things competitive, we’re picking Ripon Christian for the first time this year since they’re playing for a CIF Sac-Joaquin Division VII section championship on Saturday, and it seems fitting to honor their amazing season that could lead them to a state championship playoff berth. 

And, like every week, we’re throwing you our insights into the dumpster fires that are the Oakland Raiders and the San Francisco 49ers. I think a blind chicken could pick those games this year and still finish ahead of the house. 

Here’s how things are shaping up in what will, without a doubt, be our last week of picks – the victory lap after crossing the finish line:

uMyself, Eric Wohle and Chris Teicheira – We’re all taking Manteca over Christian Brothers, Ripon Christian over Rio Vista, Seattle over San Francisco and Oakland over New York. This means that amongst this group my 36-11 remains safely in check while Wohle sits in third place at 32-15. Teicheira, who went 1-3 last week, falls to 29-18 and will, without a doubt, be taking last place this year. I’m still waiting on those barber recommendations. 

uCondit – He always has to be different. Of course Mr. MHS Booster himself is taking Manteca over Christian Brothers, but he’s also taking Rio Vista over Ripon Christian, the 49ers over Seattle and the Raiders over New York. He’s currently 34-13 which means that if he’s right, we’re going to have a tie for first place after the season concludes – just like we did last year. I happen to believe that Ripon Christian will steamroll their opponents, but I appreciate Yoda’s willingness to be the contrarian for the sake of dramatic effect. It certainly makes it more fun knowing that I could – potentially – lose. 

We haven’t discussed what will happen if this ends in a tie again this year – all attempts at a punt, pass and kick competition to settle the score last year failed, and will likely repeat if we end up having to come up with something. More than likely it’ll be a coin flip, but we can decide that democratically while we’re watching Teicheira’s hair fade away into oblivion. 

Stay tuned. 

To contact reporter Jason Campbell email jcampbell@mantecabulletin.com or call 209.249.3544.