She’s a mother but she also fills the role of the father.
For 21 years and counting, Kathi Coyle, a proud single mother, has worn both hats when it comes to her son Thomas.
“My miracle,” said the Lathrop High counselor.
There’s a good reason for that: Coyle, who was hired by the Manteca Unified School District a few months into the school year, had been told she could never have kids.
But then again, she was accustomed to hearing that word – never.
It was during her high school days that a few of her teachers along with her counselor told her: “You don’t have what it takes to be successful in college,” Coyle recalled.
Her counselor recommended that she, instead, focus on a trade.
Upon hearing those words, she felt defeated. “But in my heart, I knew they were wrong,” said Coyle.
At LHS, she’s part of the educational leadership team that’s called to assist and evaluate students of their strengths, skills and abilities. Based on her own experiences, the last thing she’ll ever do is discourage them from chasing their dreams.
Over the years, Coyle has juggled parenting along with her studies – she holds two master degrees and is working towards her doctorate (a far cry from trade school) – and her work load.
Her dream was to become a school counselor. LHS and MUSD have provided her with that.
But Kathi Coyle’s journey to get there came with plenty of twists and turns.
First, her “miracle” occurred in her early 20s.
“When I was 22, my doctor told me that it would be next to impossible for me to conceive a child. I was devastated. It was two years later when I held Thomas in my arms for the first time,” she said.
Kathi Coyle took on the dual parenting role when she and Thomas were shunned by her son’s actual father. So along with Mother’s Day, which is this Sunday, they’ve always celebrated an exclusive Father’s Day together.
When she signed Thomas to play youth baseball for the Giants in Little League, Coyle took on the role of coach.
“They didn’t have enough coaches so I volunteered,” she said. “That was when I also became a Giants fan.”
Her first job in education was that of a director at a Tracy tutoring service. From there, she became a fifth-grade teacher at a Stockton private school.
Coyle finally became a counselor while working with at-risk youngsters at Stockton Unified’s Intermediate Alternative School. Her position was a budget-cut casualty due to the recession.
She worked temporarily as a career counselor for the San Joaquin County Office of Education.
Coyle had some nightmarish moments in her next two jobs – first, as a mental health counselor at a Modesto facility and then as a clinical social worker for troubled teenage boys in Turlock.
Working with LHS students, in comparison, have been a godsend for her.
Just being a parent has been a blessing.