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Want to stop the spread of crack? Then legalize it
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Legalize “crack”.

Let’s face it. We’ve lost the war.

The “crack” epidemic is here to stay so we might as well embrace it.

Back in 1992 they said it was just a fad. Teens were just experimenting, pushing the limits.

Here we are 22 years later and that 14-year-old you saw with “crack” is still doing it.

But now instead of being a youthful “crack” addict they are a pathetic looking 36-year-old “crack” addict.

It has also led to “crack” babies. It is heart-breaking and pathetic to see 7-year-olds already doing “crack” because their parents or siblings are doing it - so much for outgrowing bad habits.

Society is powerless to control “crack”. Even in prison - where the epidemic began -  “crack” is still rampant.

Law enforcement can’t do anything about it even though it is an affront to civilized behavior.

The odds are when that once 14-year-old is in his 70s playing shuffleboard on his Wii at the virtual senior center, he’ll still be doing “crack”.

We are on our way to becoming a nation where people are so obsessed with the addiction they will probably leave detailed instructions that they want to be buried with “crack”.

There is only one way to stop “crack” from destroying decency in America and that is to embrace it.

Teachers need to switch to “crack” as should police, the military, parents, and even pastors. A good number of politicians already are into “crack” but they still do it behind closed doors unless of course they post a picture of them doing “crack” - or worse - on Facebook or e-mail a photo of themselves with “crack” to constituents they’re smitten with.

Once “crack” is legalized, crime will drop significantly. It’ll be tough for a 50-year-old criminal with a severe “crack” addiction to stay on his feet while trying to flee an officer.

By embracing “crack”, it eliminates the urge to consider it an act of rebellion to do “crack”.

That’s why we need laws that will make “crack” use universal.

First it should be illegal for any clothing store to sell pants to customers that aren’t at least three sizes too big.

Second, those choosing boxer shorts must make sure they are baggy enough so people can clearly see a full moon rising. As for those opting for briefs, they must be a size or two too small so nothing is left to the imagination.

Imagine what the world would be like if a bunch of teens into “crack” or a gang of older “crack”-sters in their late 20s and 30s all of a sudden started passing businessmen, older gentlemen, the 1 percent, and other adults on “crack”.

The disgust alone would probably trigger a rebellious act such as wearing tailored slacks.

Then, if all goes well, showing “crack” will no longer be cool and the next generation will all be “slackers”.

This column is the opinion of managing editor, Dennis Wyatt, and does not necessarily represent the opinion of The Bulletin or Morris Newspaper Corp. of CA.  He can be contacted at or 209-249-3519.